Apparently, my blog is a gateway to the interweb for freaks and rumor mongers. I often share with friends some of the most bizarre keywords people use to find my blog. My buddy Hannah suggested I make it a weekly post. I thought, “Wow what a perfect idea. It takes very little effort, and fulfills my blog post a day commitment. Yea, Hannah.”
So I give you the first installment of “Freakiest Searches of the Week.” I will post them as they appear in my statistics without benefit of editing. I want you to get the total feel of the kind of people that visit this blog. BTW – I’m not making fun of you. It’s the other people that read this blog. You’re cool. I’ve always told people that about you.
10 – sci-fi original movies suck – Not so much freaky as true. I’ve stated as much many times myself on this very blog. I just appreciate the “straight to the point” nature of the search terms used.
9 – the takers movie february 19, 2009 – This one may only be freaky to me. Did someone make a movie out of my book without telling me? I talked to a couple of Hollywood film guys a few years ago, but they dropped off my radar. Quick, check IMDB and see if I need to call a lawyer!
8 – getting over rejevtion – Rejection is terrible, and I’ve written about it a couple of times here, but I have never written about “rejevtion.” Me thinks I’ve spotted your problem.
7 – why didn’t mj and prince do a song – As far as I know, MJ and Prince did many songs. In fact, they built a career out of doing songs.
6 – how many times has brett favre come out – Now, you see, this is how rumors get started.
5 – michael vick shirtless – Someone likes their psychopaths shirtless. Sure he tortures dogs, but man, is he ripped!
4 – jerry seinfeld shirtless – Someone likes their observational humorists shirtless. Sure he complains about airline food, but man, is he… ripped? No really, is he? Why would someone want to see Seinfeld shirtless?
3 – guy feet videos – I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.
2 – pics breast from steroids – It’s hard to know whether or not this person saw this as a benefit or concern.
And the number 1 freakiest search term used to find my blog is:
1. old ladies with tattoos – Part of me is glad I don’t know who the person is that googled this particular string of words, but another part of me would love to know so I can inform the authorities!
For the record, I am proud to proclaim that most of the people who crafted these search terms were sorely disappointed when they arrived at my blog.