A Belated Recounting of My Experience at Book Expo America

Brooke Shields, yet another person I didnt meet at BEA!

Brooke Shields, yet another person I didn't meet at BEA!

I promised to give a follow-up report on Book Expo America sometime ago, and I’ve put it off much too long. So get a snack, pop a top on your favorite beverage, and take your phone off the hook because you are in for a treat. Here we go… It was… transcendent isn’t the right word… weird… a little… exciting… at times… uneventful… 95% of the time.

This is my third year going to BEA, and it never ceases to amaze me the sheer volume of products and services related to the world of publishing. This year they even had a teeth whitening booth. For $99 you could have your teeth whitened in 15 minutes. The problem is you could only drink clear liquids for 24 hours. Coffee is a staple for the convention floor and a nice frothy lager is a staple for after. I had no 24 hour window where I was planning on imbibing just clear liquids. This BEA being in LA, I did see a lot of stars… kind of. – Dr. Ruth (she is smaller than small), Leonard Nimoy, Kevin Neland, Dave Madden (Reuben Kincaid from the Partridge Family), Jamie Lee Curtis, and Bernadette Peters’ hair (Bernadette was attached to it, but I couldn’t see her for the crowd). You’ll notice that there aren’t any names of literary note on that list. I wasn’t invited to any of the parties where those types gather and talk about conjugating verbs, diagramming sentences, passive voice, and how much they hate the proliferation of text speak, i.e. lol, rotflmao, btw, cul8er, etc. Not being in their circle yet, I only imagine this is what they talk about. I’m sure the conversations aren’t nearly as exciting.

This year, unlike the previous two, I did do a signing. Actually, it turned out to be two signings because someone canceled and they wanted to fill the slot. It was surreal. I’m not famous. Not even moderately so, but I had lines. Some greeted me as if I were a rock star, some greeted me as if I were an extra on Star Trek, some greeted me as if I were someone who might be somebody someday so they better get their signed copy so they can sell it on ebay. Seriously, a week after I got back there were signed copies of my books on ebay. I didn’t have the stomach to see if anyone ever put in bids on them. One gentleman even got angry when I ran out of books. It was flattering and terrifying all at once. Apparently, I’m just unknown enough to complain to. I bet Stephen King doesn’t get yelled at when he runs out of books at a signing.

I did meet John Scalzi, and managed to creep him out. See my open letter to John where I explain my strange behavior.

BTW – Wish me luck. I have several major publishers considering picking up the Oz Chronicles. If I sign with them, maybe I can finally get invited to one of those literary parties at BEA.

Back From BEA and Poorly Rested

Well, I zoomed into Los Angeles on Thursday, grabbed some cheap Chinese food and locked myself in my room cursing my advancing years and the three hour time difference between Charleston and Los Angeles. I worked the floor and met some interesting people, but the fun started when I hit the signing area. I only got two books signed. One I previously talked about, Dave Madden. The Partridge Family was a big part of my life growing up, and I still consider the comedic timing between Danny Bonaduce and Dave Madden one of the best of that era in sitcoms.

The second book I got signed was Zoe’s Tale by John Scalzi, and I think I totally managed to freak Scalzi out. I consult with authors every day about how to market books online. I use Scalzi as an example of an author who has successfully built an online community and maintained a substantial fan base that basically serves has his volunteer sales force because they love him so much. This is what I should have told Scalzi, but instead I said. “John Scalzi! I’m a big fan of Old Man’s War and your blog. I talk about you every day.” To which my coworker Whitney said “Yes he does!” (It’s a small office, and we all hear each other’s phone conversations.) Scalzi looked somewhat alarmed as this 42-year-old man is staring him like a stalker. I never explained to him in what context I talk about him. I imagine he assumes I have pictures of him in my cube with candles burning and a plastic bag with a lock of his hair. I did get an ARC of Zoe’s Tale hastily signed by Scalzi with an eye towards the closest exit point.

I’ll be back here later to talk about my own signings. It was great getting to meet some of the readers, and a little strange at the same time.

If you’ve never been to BEA, go! It’s in New York next year. I’ll see you there.

One More Day of BEA

I’m just about worn worn out from the show. Saw a bunch of celebs yesterday, but I only got excited by one. Met Dave Madden (aka Reuben Kincaid from the Partridge Family). Very cool!

And in the spirit of BEA, I’ll put in a plug for his book. Here’s the link. Buy it! Read it! Review it!

Reuben On Wry

In Los Angeles – BEA Here I Come

Arrived in Los Angeles.  Had a relatively painless trip, but I witnessed three things that terrified and mystified me.

1.     I stopped at FedEx this morning on the way to the airport and watched in amazement while a UPS driver walked in the building and delivered a package to someone who works at FedEx.  I think this is one of the signs of the apocalypse. 

2.     I almost walked off the plane in Charleston this morning when an International soccer team boarded.  My history of International soccer teams and air travel is sketchy, but I’m under the impression they crash in the mountains a lot and eat each other.  My one saving grace is there aren’t any mountains between Charleston and Atlanta. 

3.     Some guy on the flight from Atlanta to LA stole my seat.  When I pointed out that ‘B’ (my seat) was the aisle seat, he said “No it isn’t.”  I showed him the diagram and he was unfazed.  When I said “Yeah,  I really think the aisle is ‘B’” he wasn’t moved.  I was stunned and shocked at the lengths to which he denied reality.  I sat next to the window and had a very awkward 4 ½ hour flight.   All I could think was we were going to crash and everyone was going to think I was that jerkhole because he was sitting in 30’B’ – MY SEAT! 

On a less frightening note, I finished my rewrites and my new outline.  Finished until I get more editorial suggestions back that is. 

BTW – I forogt to bring a book so I picked up Twilight by Stephanie Meyer in the airport.  Vampire romance is not my thing, but I am enjoying it so far. 

Book Expo America – I’m signing

I will be signing all three Oz Chronicles books at Book Expo America in Los Angeles this year. I will be signing Book Two and Book Three on Saturday from 4:00 pm to 5:00 pm and Book One on Sunday from 9:30 am to 10:30 am. I know that’s backwards. I was originally planning on just doing Book One because of the recent Writer’s Digest award, but a time slot opened up on Saturday, and I was given the opportunity to fill the slot. So come by Saturday get Book Two and Three, and then come back on Sunday to get Book One. All three books! What could be better? Okay, maybe a cure for cancer, and an end to all wars, but other than that…