If Gorillas… (Part 9)

If gorillas dress up as giant birds, it’s usually because they didn’t read the fine print on their personal appearance contracts.  Man, there is nothing sadder than a gorilla moping around in a giant bird costume.  Makes you think, doesn’t it?  The world is a cruel, cruel place.

"Get my agent on the phone!"

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If Gorillas… (Part 8)

"Dude, I cannot believe you don't have fangs!"

If gorillas see Robert Pattinson, they shout, “Fangs!  Fangs, Pattinson!  Vampires have fangs, you jerk!  And they don’t sparkle!”  Then they open their mouths to show him what they mean by fangs.  They never bite him though… not a lot.

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