I just noticed that the blog surpassed the 100,000 views milestone. Yippee, for me. You really do like silly and useless postings. I sensed that about you. And before you ask, the answer is no. The 100,000 views do not include my own visits to this blog. WordPress doesn’t count my own views. I’d be well on my way to half a million views if that were the case. I just can’t get enough of myself! I’m no John Scalzi, but this does mean that if he were to develop an allergy to blogging and have to stop, I could very well pass him in views in about 15 years, but then again that would leave me with no one to steal style and material from. So, rock on Scalzi. Happy to be in your wake.
In the spirit of my friends* at the Sci Fi Channel changing the spelling of their channel name to SyFy in an effort to trademark it, and establish a bona fide brand name for themselves, I am changing the name of the genre I occasionally write in to Sigh Fie, which literally means “breathy disgust.” Why? Because… ehhh… I often find myself in a state of breathy disgust (ironically, usually after watching a Sci Fi Channel original movie) and honestly, fie reminds me of pie and I like pie.
Makes no sense? Neither does changing your name to a word that is a venereal disease in the Polish language. John Scalzi brilliantly commented on this yesterday on his blog. The folks at Sci Fi, or SyFy or,… whatever you want to call them, are undergoing this identity crisis because they can’t trademark the word “Sci Fi.” Trademark translates into exclusivity which translates into cash money. What happened to using initials like NBC or CBS or ABC? Here’s an idea, SFC or you could be really bold and call it the “For Some Inexplicable Reason We Air Professional Wrestling” Channel. Another suggestion, the Ice Spiders Channel (trust me no one will ever fight them over these trademark rights).
The amazing thing is that this decision was not made lightly. They probably held focus groups, hired branding experts, flipped dozens of coins, conjured up the ghost of Robert A. Heinlein, and rubbed Buddha’s belly on more than one occasion, and still, this is the best they could do. I say they scrap the whole thing, sit down with the creators of Battlestar Galactica and have them come up with the new name. Those guys can create the crap out of stuff. Heck, call it the “The Folks Who Were Smart Enough to Air Battlestar Galactica” Channel. Anything would be better than SyFy.
*I’m using friends in the broadest possible terms, as in complete strangers who’ve never, ever met before. In fact, they may hate me. I did make fun of their movies. That could explain why they’ve never called me… or heard of me.
I hope all is well. We exchanged greetings at this year’s BEA, and I may have given you the impression that I am a stalker. I’m not. I realize that no stalker thinks they’re a stalker, but I promise you I’m not. Allow me to explain. First, why you may have gotten the impression that I am a stalker:
I walked up to your signing table at BEA just as your session ended. I had a signing right after you. I introduced myself to you and you very kindly offered to give me a signed copy of Zoe’s Tale. I happily said “Yes.” While you were signing the book, I said the following; “You don’t understand. I talk about you every day.” To which my friend and co-worker said in a very exasperated voice, “Yes, he does.” Before I could explain why I talk about you every day, I was called away to tend to something behind the curtain. I never had a chance to explain why a 42-year-old man talks about you every day.
Any reasonable adult male may have been creeped out by hearing that another adult male talks about him every day. My friend and co-worker who was there even confirmed that I came off quite stalkerish.
Now, let me explain why I’m not a stalker. My job (beyond the author gig) is helping author’s develop marketing strategies for their books. I advise them on how to build a community around themselves and their book. I use your blog as an example. Don’t get me wrong. I’m a fan of the Old Man’s War universe, and once I get through with some of my own projects I plan on jumping into Zoe’s Tale. And if I were ever to stalk someone you would be on my list. But in this case, I am merely turning authors onto your blog so they can see how a blog should be implemented and managed.
So, sleep tight. I’m not a crazed fan.